During the mass closures of all live concerts and performances in 2020 and 2021 in California where we live, I saw a drive-up concert offered right off the beach in Ventura, California, and jumped at it. I asked Rick if he could take the day off and texted his best friend and his new girlfriend to invite them as well. We also invited some neighbors and their kids. We all planned to attend the concert with our families. Even though it was not going to be live, I was so excited to have fun with our friends again.
Two days before the concert, I remind Rick about the concert. He looks at his work schedule and realizes that he is scheduled to work. He tries to take the day off, but his boss says to him “sorry, we are so understaffed these days.” The priorities of the job and the city’s safety needs come first.
My first thought was of course disappointment. I contacted Rick's bestie and his girlfriend and our neighbors to see if they could still attend. They could all attend with their significant others, but I would be attending solo with my boys.
I spent the concert sitting in the back of my kid-filled mini-SUV. I was the “cool car" where all the kids hung out. I tried to enjoy myself. And I did! I danced and kicked my feet to the music while I chilled with the kids. Check out my brand new book for police kids, Boots by the Door.
Someone asked me this past week if I ever feel jealous of what other people have that are not police or first responder wives, such as their spouse's home at 6pm each night. I am not perfect and there was a moment that I looked over at Rick's bestie and his girlfriend sitting closely holding each other and missed Rick to pieces. But, I consciously choose to embrace this life. I am proud of Rick serving our community. He does God's work. So do I. I spent the evening with my amazing boys and their friends. It took me time to feel comfortable going somewhere solo and enjoying myself. I find ways to curb loneliness; read more here.